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Guaranteed to make you feel OLD? 

 

Date: Thursday, June 28th, 2001

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly

change things. Each year, the staff at Beloit College, in Wisconsin,

puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset

of this year's incoming freshman.

 

Here is this year's list:

 

The people who are starting college this fall were

born in 1982.

 

They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and probably

did not know he had ever been shot.

 

They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.

 

Black Monday, 1987, is as significant to them as the Great Depression.

 

There has been only one Pope.

 

They were 11 when the Soviet Union broke apart and do not remember the Cold War.

 

They have never feared a nuclear war.

 

They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.

 

Tianamen Square means nothing to them

 

Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.

 

Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.

 

The expression, "You sound like a broken record", means nothing to them.

 

They have never owned a record player.

 

They have probably never played "Pac Man", and have never heard of Pong.

 

They may never have heard of an 8 track. The Compact Disc was introduced when they were 1 year old.

 

As far as they know, stamps have always cost about 33 cents.

 

They have always had an answering machine.

 

Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have they seen

a black and white TV.

 

They have always had cable.

 

There have always been VCRs, but they have no idea what BETA was.

 

They cannot fathom not having a remote control.

 

They don't know what a cloth baby diaper is, or know about the "Help

me, I've fallen and I can't get up" commercial.

 

Feeling old yet? There's more:

 

They were born the year that the Walkman was introduced by Sony.

 

Roller skating has always meant inline for them.

 

Jay Leno has always been the host of the Tonight Show.

 

They have no idea when, or why, Jordache jeans were cool.

 

Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.

 

They have never seen Larry Bird play.

 

They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.

 

The Vietnam War is as ancient history to them as WWI, WWII and the

Civil War.

 

They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.

 

They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.

 

They never heard: "Where's the beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel"

or "De plane, De plane!".

 

They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. was.

 

The Titanic was found? They thought we always knew.

 

Michael Jackson has always been white.

 

Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not rock

bands.

 

There has always been MTV.

 

They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

 

Do you feel old yet?